Category: short stories

The Last Christmas

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We come to a scene in Long Island, NY. A big red house on a small side road of the only highway in or out of the hamptons. A single mother and a teenager from a class you don’t hear much about in this area. The holidays are all about traditions, this small family was surely different. The daughter, Aminah, had no wants other than to live comfortably. Something she knew was overly ambitious. The mother, Denise, was a dreamer who brought her daughter into the world in hopes to change it. With their family of two the tradition of Christmas was simple. Start shopping two weeks before and buy the tree two days before. Nothing else would be done until the twenty-third, starting with finally putting the lights and bulbs on the tree. Then all day Christmas eve the two of them will work until two or three am wrapping all the presents, putting the finishing touches on the tree, and baking at least five dozen cookies for aunts and uncles.

That was their tradition for the past decade, a smooth dance the two of them completed each year. This one would be diffrent though, and the last one the two of them would spend together. Aminah knew this despite her mother trying her best to console her. The whole year Denise had been in and out of the hospital. This was the first month they had been in their own apartment, and together, since March. Aminah had heard whisperings of Denise denying a gift of a kidney from a classmates family memeber. It seemed each day her mother grew sicker, and her biggest fears were coming true. The clock struck ten, and Denise called Aminah into her room.

“I’ll get up in an hour and we can start setting everything up.” Aminah looked at her mother, pale, slightly out of breath because she had missed dialysis for a few days. “It’s fine, mom. I can do it. Just rest and I’ll see you in the morning.”

She tested the different sets of lights, putting up her favorite bulbs and mixing them with the ones they had bought the other day. Tinsel all around the tree, while she chuckled thining about he cute elves from Santa Clause breaking everyone out with it. Lastly, she wrapped her mom’s presents, there would be no cookies this year. She finished everything around five in the morning, checked on her mom before finally going to bed.

Waking up four hours later, Aminah went to her mom’s room for them to open their presents. Denise began to cry as soon as she entered the living room. “You did such a great job, Aminah! The most beautiful tree we’ve had, for sure.” As always, to her surprise, there were about ten extra presents under the tree with her name on it. Aminah still doesn’t know how her mom was able to hide her presents; they would just appear under the tree. When did her mom do it? It had looked like she hadn’t moved since the morning. Most people then watch the parades or Christmas movies, but Aminah was never a fan of these things. So the two of them tuned into the radio and switched from the Oldies station, Delilah, and BLI. Music should never stay in one decade when being listened to.

Aminah started brunch, her signature dish, scrambled eggs with cheese and pancakes. The two sat singing songs, eating, and not talking about the elephant in the room. A beautiful memory, indeed.

Mi Ahn

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He awoke in the fuzzy pink floor chair. Head in the seat the rest of his body outstretched on the new carpet. The veggie knife next to his head, he wonders why it is there. Arching his back into a bridge, settling his bones like a cat, he looks at his surroundings. Seeing the numerous empty green soju bottles scattered on the floor and table. A sharp pain rockets inside his temple, he needs water and a hangover cure. A memory floats through his head like a movie, two people in tears. His heart cringes with the memory of their wounded faces.

“We love you! We can’t keep allowing yourself to drink your life away.”

“Don’t lie! You don’t love me! No one actually likes me!”

There is no turning back now. He normally acts like he forgets what happens when he’s drunk. Most people believe him, they are no match for his self-delusions. He gets up, steadying himself, and sees if he can find his lovers. Looking through the different rooms he’s shocked to be unable to find them. Each of them had their own personal room because they were their own person. They shared the house and everything else, but they had their own room when they needed to be alone. Seems like an interesting way to live right? He didn’t like it, his lovers were very much into being their own person. They loved him wholeheartedly but still knew how to be themselves. This is actually why he loved them, that they were so comfortable with themselves. Something he’s still learning.

“Maybe they decided to go grocery shopping. I’ll just call them.”

Self-delusion. More memories float into his head. Flashes of him yelling and crying. The two of them crying and talking to him softly, stroking his wrists. Petting him like a child who’s found out what death is for the first time. Another flash finding the two of them in bed cradling each other, in her room. She’s crying.

“We were having such a great dinner. He cooked both of our favorites. I don’t understand how it turned out like this.”

He walks in; knife in hand placing the blade on the other man’s neck. Getting in bed with them he puts his legs over both of theirs. 

“What if I kill you guys right now? I wouldn’t let you guys leave without me though, don’t worry.” he said.

“You don’t have the balls. You couldn’t kill us. All you do is make these dramatic ploys for attention. Which, by the way, don’t make any sense because everything already revolves around you.” He liked the vibrations he felt as the man said this to him. Was he right?

He moves the knife onto her now. Dragging the blade on her left breast onto her stomach. Their little pea has been growing nicely, she’s even gotten plump growing her. He then moves the knife onto her face staring into her eyes as he slides it down her cheek. There was no fear, just anger, and exhaustion. 

He had tried to call both of their cell phones four or five times by now. All the memories of last night making the pit in his stomach feel heavier. What a terrible mistake he made last night. What a horrible person he is. How had they stayed with him for so long? He remembers that last night was a special occasion. It was their third anniversary, the three of them. Jack and he had been together for six years now, but Molly had been with them for three. He goes to his room and realizes for the first time that his room was the one that they shared the most. It was a perfect combination of all of them. Molly’s love for art and culture decorates the walls. Jack’s  love for creating a safe and balanced space made the room seem bigger than it was. His contribution to the room are the different knick knacks he collected from his trips overseas. They all had an impressive collection of language books, two and a half bookshelves full.

“Honey!! We’re home!” Said Jack and Molly in unison. Crashing into the apartment with excitement.

“I smell samgyapsal!!” said Molly

“I smell buckwheat noodles and kimchi!” said Jack

“Welcome home!” He said giving them both a long kiss. “What you are smelling is correct. There are pieces of pork belly ready to eat and delicious Korean dishes to go with it! Happy Anniversary!” 

The three of them sitting down on the blue and white carpet, making themselves comfortable. He gets two shot glasses for Jack and himself. and a soju from the freezer.  

“I thought we decided that we’d stop drinking altogether, for the baby?” Jack said raising an eyebrow at him. 

“Today is a special occasion!!! Let’s celebrate, it’s not like we drink every day.”

“You do though. Every meal.” Jack said

“This is different. We are celebrating!”

“Ok. I won’t argue today. Only one bottle though, ok?” Jack said 

“That’s all we need!”

There was an answer. Four hours of trying to call them and they finally answer.

“Hey! We were at the doctor. Today was another sonogram. We found out the sex!!” said Molly

He couldn’t hold it in any longer. He broke down in tears gasping for air ever so often.

“I thought you guys left. I thought you weren’t coming back.”

“We love you. You think we’d do that without some kind of note or something? We will be talking though. Once we get home. We’ll hold the good news for afterward.” Molly said.

There was shifting and weird sounds until Jack’s voice came through the phone.

“I told her that you wouldn’t remember that we had a doctor’s appointment. I knew you’d worry. I think this was her way of getting back at you slightly. Serves you right.”

He sniffed “mi ahn ha da”

“jir dao ah. woo men ai ni.” jack said

“I love you.”

“I love you more.” Jack said

“I love you like the stars that have shined before, forever.” Molly said. .  . . .

 

What is lonely?

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She remembers this feeling. It’s nothing new, a decade ago she felt it too. Restless, disappointed, and scared. Still having trouble with fixing these issues. She used to wonder how people acted the way they did, how they kept moving. She hasn’t been able to shake the feeling of uselessness as she wonders once again the point to anything. She has been staring at her phone, that cost her more than her rent, realizing that no one was going to text her. Even if they did text her or call what would she even talk about? How she is stuck? That she knows soon everyone will be gone doing great things, while she’s still here doing nothing. Or, how about her fear of doing things because after putting all that effort in you didn’t even enjoy it? Talk about the empty? It doesn’t matter, so she sits. Or, rather, lies on her bed staring at the ceiling. Thinking about how much time is left on this earth for her. It weighs upon her chest and makes her want to do something.

“Twenty-four years is so long. I feel so tired. I haven’t even done or seen much. Nothing has happened to me. However, I’m over it. There are people who’ve done and seen so much. Someone could do great with this life. I really wish it wasn’t given to me.” She thinks.

She decides it’s too quiet, that was what was wrong. She puts on some music which does nothing but reminds her of the past. She wraps the music around her like the comfort blanket it is. She stops hearing music and only sees pictures. The different people she liked. The different people she tried to befriend. The realization that she never learned to connect with anyone.

Her eyes grow heavy and she accepts that none of this will change. All because of her. It all goes black to the perfect world called sleep. Her phone lighting up and singing goodnight.

 

Gone

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She had wrapped herself for me. I did not open it on the day. When I came to retrieve her next day the ribbon was untied. Someone had stolen my present. Was it more that she ran away?

Choice

TheLovelyPenelope's avatar

She sat down in the leather seat, petting. Soft brown leather prepared, to tell the truth, this time. The older man in front of her pale and gray, legs crossed, judging. She has, to tell the truth, but where to start.

“How are you feeling today? Anything you want to talk about?” He says while opening up his notepad.

“I don’t know. I don’t have much to talk about. I haven’t really been doing much. Work, sleep, eat, repeat. The days I have off seem endless yet too short.”

“What do you do on your days off? Do you do anything that  you want to enjoy?”

“Well, nothing really. Everything sucks and I’m broke. What is there to do? So, I stay home and watch movies or stupid television shows. Anything that doesn’t have to do with reality because I avoid the things that I don’t like. I watch the things that I want to do and feel but dare not go after.”

“Why do you feel that  you shouldn’t go after them? What stops you from enjoying these things?”

“For one, I don’t deserve them. I also have learned at an early age wanting things and actually getting them normally ends badly. The path there sucked, you get there and it sucks still. Relationships, goals, life in general at least that what it feels like. Who knows maybe I’m wrong but then that just proves further that I don’t belong here. I’m pretty sure there has been some mistake.”

“Relationships. Let’s talk more about that, which one of your relationships have made you fee this way? Who was it and when was it?”

“I remember it well, it was when I knew that living with my father was never an option. It’s also when I knew his truth without anyone telling me. Something he would not admit to me until I was sixteen or seventeen years old.

I was about six years old, excited because it was Daddy’s night. I get to sleep over the big blue house, I would get real television, no bunny ears, be away from my mom, see my grandpa. It was going to be great it would be everything that I wanted. Daddy wanted to get something from the corner store. I’ve always liked car rides so I’m excited to go with him. When we get there is this man there. Wearing all white with a long Santa beard, saying hello to my father. My father says hi back and tells him to come over to the car to meet me. He tells my dad that he can’t, his feet are stuck but hello little one. I tell my dad we should just go, that the man isn’t right. Even though being a sheltered child I knew danger when I saw it. I knew that if my dad went over to that man, his feet would get stuck too. My dad didn’t listen to me, he went to the fake Santa they talked for a while, it felt like over an hour. I rolled down the window and yelled to my dad to come on. I’m a child I should go to bed early, even though I never did go to bed early. I was always one to toss and turn and watch the clock. Go to sleep for a few hours and wake up in the morning like I slept for a whole day. Anyway, he comes to the car and he says to me that my uncle will be coming to pick me up because he knows that I am tired. He was going to hang out with his friend for a while. My favorite uncle came to pick me up, he came to pick me up and we sang the songs on the radio on the way to his house. In the back of my mind, I knew my dad wasn’t going to be coming for me that night. I talked to my uncle as if he was, I told him that my dad was silly, but he was definitely coming to pick me up. My uncle’s girlfriend fixed me some food, I can’t remember her face, I can only remember that I thought she was very pretty.  While I was eating my food and I was telling my uncle about the things my dad and I were going to do. When I finished I looked at my uncle and said ‘Daddy’s not coming back tonight is he?’ He looked back at me sad and nodded his head. I knew my dad had left me, I knew my uncle wouldn’t tell me directly what it was that took him away, but I knew. I’ve always known. My mom never had to tell me, my dad never had to confess it. I knew. I’ve never told anyone about this. Cause there was no reason to I felt,  but I liked telling it.”

“Well, I’m honored. Thank you for telling me. I guess I can understand how you felt that way after that. Especially after not opening up about it. People around you thinking that you don’t know but you know pretty well actually.”

“Ya, adults never think kids are very smart. They are, they know and understand a lot more than what we give them credit for. This is why I think philosophy is interesting, to think that we have all the knowledge from previous but we forget it and have to learn it all again.”

“That is an interesting concept. Plato is one of the most interesting philosophers out there.”

“Let me ask you this though doctor. If you had the knowledge of your previous reality and the choice to live. Would you choose to be born doctor?”

The timer went off telling the doctor and the patient that time was up. She got up with not a word and left. Normally the doctor would keep going a little after the session, make sure everything was wrapped up. She left him no chance of that, leaving without the answers.

 

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The Drowning Child

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There once was a child born underwater. Her mother felt it safer and a better way to grow her. She lived her days watching her mother and all else walk over her. From where she stood neither way of living looked better. Her mother was sick and kept the extent of it from her, by the time she found out her worst nightmare was upon her. She knew there’d be people wanting to save her, but she wasn’t so sure if they really wanted to help her. The death of her mother made her pull herself further.  Under the deep blue filter the people looked smaller, were they just ghosts of what was offered?  She questioned if these realms were even for her. So many people arms outstretched above her, still, she just continued to swim down under. As she saw the helping ropes and good blessings she started to realize that she should have never even bothered. Every day is a horror that she cursed these poor people hoping to see the drowning child to touch and comfort. She never learned and didn’t want to, still, she felt bad for the people above her. She should try to live like they, she thought often. She was never able to get past horror. She’s still down under the water filling it with tears and salt hoping to choke her.

Stolen Firsts Pt. 2

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Fighting with the door, I stumbled into my dad’s apartment. Wiping my lips before walking in; the bottom half of my face still feeling wet. I didn’t go to that random guy’s apartment, John he said his name was. I did get his number, saying that I would call him and maybe take him up on his offer. I hugged my dad, told him about my crazy night at work, and my crazy drunken after work party with my bestie. Forgetting all about what had happened a block away from his apartment.

Summer turned into fall and the what if questions began to creep in.  What if I had gone with him, What if I had called him the next day? Would I have turned into a manhunt case? With the curiosity building and my libido bubbling over I gave him a call.

“Hello?” He answered with his thick Italian accent. It made me wonder how long he has been here.

“Hey! Um, is this John? I don’t know if you remember me but I met you in Harlem.  My name is Upenda?”

“Oh yes! I remember you, the beautiful girl I saw when I was getting off of work a few months ago. It has been so long! Why did you not call me, you didn’t like me?”

“No. Just busy, you know. You work around where I was that night? Where do you work?”

“I’m a personal trainer at Planet Fitness. If you ever need help getting in shape I can help you. However, I wouldn’t want you to lose your body. I love my women bigger.”

I sighed internally. Will this be a fetish thing? Not that I wasn’t alright with it. I just didn’t know what kind it would turn into.

I knew when he said “Baby, let me take you out to eat and shopping. I bet my baby would like that, right? Daddy loves to see his baby happy.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

How’d you like it? I know my grammar and sentence structure is terrible. Please leave comments and feedback!!

Stolen Firsts

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“Oh, shit!” He said, with panic. I looked down at him worried “What’s wrong? What’s happening”

“There’s a lot of blood. I’ve never seen this much blood. Does it hurt?” “No, let me get up.” I get up staring at the bed that looks like a murder scene. I then feel a rush of blood and other wet things pour out between my legs. The floor is red, my clothes are red and he’s going to need to buy a new bed.

Two years earlier, coming out of the subway was when I first met him. I was wasted, tired and hungry. Climbing the never ending stairs while mentally counting how many blocks it was to my father’s house. A muscular man, 6’2” walking towards me, throws his cigarette and chugs the last of his coffee. He then says to me “Hey baby, did you have a goodnight?” I don’t know this man, I don’t know anyone here. I turn around to see if someone is behind me. Three am really is the hour that everyone stops existing. Noticing that I thought he was talking to someone else he grabs my chin and leans me against the bus stop. My first kiss was all teeth and saliva, from a stranger. I didn’t like it but I didn’t say no, so I guess that convinced him to ask the next question. “Want to come to my house? It’s just up the street from here.”

> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >  > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >

 

Should I continue? I’d love to see some comments

Extraction

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They always smell sterile don’t they? Dentist offices. She wonders why people are afraid of this place. Most people wouldn’t even come to this one. Hidden, underground, and with no windows. She isn’t scared, even though, she’s going to remove all four of her wisdom teeth. There’s a new dental assistant today, pretty handsome; another distraction to take away the pain perhaps? Sally, the receptionist, is telling her back information on the dentist, on how much he loves extractions. Knowing actually starts to make her nervous. Her overactive imagination kicks in and she pictures this man itching to pull anything. Finished with her procedure she smiles into the mirror and sees a toothless grin. She shudders at the thought.

There’s whistling coming down the stairs and footsteps that sounded like a bigger person made them. A man who looks like the Spanish version of Santa Claus walks into the dental office.

“Today is a glorious day!!” He said with jolly “Are you ready for today? Let’s get started!”
She looks at Sally as the man goes behind the door to set up.
“Don’t worry.” Sally said, “He’s really good. Everyone comments they don’t feel a thing.”

Sitting in the chair the new assistant puts on classical music. A big change from the normal random TV shows they play. She makes small talk and notices a wedding ring. Too bad, she was going to get his number for this girl who has a thing for Russian men. The dentist came in with six needles filled with Novocain.  He fills her up effortlessly; one needle for each corner, one for the roof of her mouth, and the last one for her bottom gums.

He takes off his mask to smile at her “There is no need to worry sweetheart. I have a friend with me today. You probably know him . . .” She blinks at him as the suction continues in the silence. “Jesus. He is with me and he is my best friend. Everything will be fine.”  She remembers that this dentist is also a pastor; God gave him two callings.

She tenses up as she feels him pulling at her tooth, she’s too doped up to feel pain but can still feel movement. Each tooth comes out with no problems; the assistant and Santa dentist make small talk. Teaching the assistant of the basics of extraction he tells the assistant that he likes to do it the natural way. Santa dentist says it’s the best way to get a clean pull and is less dangerous for the patient. All that she knows is that she may need to take a nap; the last tooth is taking longer than the others. Is this the reason why Frank Ocean made that song? She thought before everything went black.