Category: poetry

A Cat Named November

In the daylight I felt my body quake
Warmth of the sun on my back
The sound of his breath in my ear
A cat meowing on the fire escape

I padded across to the kitchen
My studio apartment felt woken
As if my stretch and yawn caused a stir
The man however didn’t

Put on the coffee
Crack a few eggs
Scramble it with some whole milk
Talk to the cat

It had appeared one rainy fall
Cats normally choose you
He? She? It? November?
Came with the scent of burning wood and onset rain

Autumn was the greatest time of year
Sweater weather, Comfiness
The love and appreciation of what you have
November came with a loud meow

An orange tabby
With brown highlights
Begging for safety
They smelled the rain too
Ran inside as the window opened

A relationship
Not ownership
Comes and goes when sees fit
Has a bed, food, and water

Leaves presents on the fire escape
Only comes in when it rains and to eat
Says good morning and good night
Studies, cooks and sings with me

The man stirred and raised quickly
Nightmare? Slept so good was unaware?
Where he was, who he was with
His focus came slow just like his sly smile

November came in
Meowing as if asking who he was
“A friend who stayed over. Handsome, right?”
The man’s smile turned boyish

Hand stretched out to welcome this authority
November must have approved
Jumped in the man’s lap
Purring and kneading his bare skin

Brown boy
Orange cat
Moring glory
Let’s eat

November enjoyed a bowl of wet food Between I and him
Trusted, but know your place
November kept an eye on him









Prayers

Sleep, work, break to eat, work, home, eat, and sleep again

Same thing different day

When you were a kid you were the only one who didn’t want to grow up

You were the only one that seemed to understand the truth

Nothing gets better, you can buy things to mask, but don’t get addicted

You prayed

Not having to make choices

Nothing no longer being unfair

No longer fearing letting them all down

You prayed

You understood that there was probably a plan

A plan that you didn’t know

A plan you should follow, it was neither right or wrong

You prayed to no longer be apart of that plan

You prayed for eternal sleep

Yet, here you are twelve years later with nothing on your feet

Your life in a cardboard box

People giving you looks

Pity, shame, hatred and

You pray no one else will fall to this

My Place

Wiping the tears

Rubbing backs

Cooking while singing

Binge watching

Loving the way they wake up

Listening to complaints

First time in a month

First time in months

Unanswered texts

Cute pics on SM

Alone

Stories unfold

Without me

Horrors

She told me not to worry
Like she always did
Now she doesn’t answer my messages
Like those seven years before

She called one late night
As if time didn’t past I ran
Queens to Brooklyn
Leave him I said

High school reunion coming up
Neurotic nights
Too high and burdened with responsibilities
She wanted me to run to her again

I didn’t
She told me about him again
Marriage on the horizon
House sitting on a secluded island

She’s not answering my messages
She’s not answering my texts
A bad feeling sets in my stomach and heart
She’s online so she has to be ok

If he didn’t murder her and leave her phone on
She had already cut me off
Leaving me on read
Like always

Horror stories playing out in my head

Words and Phases

I have begun to realize that words are useless

There isn’t one great reason just many decent ones

People don’t listen so words fall

People don’t speak well so words are misunderstood

People are scared so words aren’t formed

The ability to scare yourself silent

That is the tragedy of being human

 

In the same breath they can bring peace

Hope, salvation, all of the positivity

All coming down to a point of view

All coming down to reading between the lines

Communication isn’t just words

It’s movement and extra sounds

A tragedy that we can’t always trust the five senses

 

Life and feelings are phases of change

One phase not looking like the other

A person’s phases and words never matching

A different stage a different meaning

Everyone’s interpretation silent

Senses and fears

We are human just words and phases

Night Walks

Insomnia

Something I’ve had since young

Winter night walks

Something that unravels my chest

Crisp air that reminds me that I am alive

Blackness and cold that I wrap around myself

Nothing is more beautiful than nature untouched

I alone walking in the weightless dark

It is possible to think of nothing

It is possible to feel like nothing

Both not actually being a bad thing

Surrounded by such grandeur

How do I actually compare?

The Hollow

Pretty lines of music

Tug on them to find more

Down the rabbit hole

Where less is more

Dirty deeds and massacres

The lines turn red

The black parade is coming

Remember that Death is your friend